Rambling.

Let's see. I've been at 30 Day Shred for 12 days now (I suppose technically 11, once I do it tonight it'll be 12). I've been walking the ~1 mile to work and back every day. I've been eating 100% on-plan. I may be imagining things but one pair of pants is somewhat more comfortable than they have been in a while. Things are good.

That's part of the problem of keeping a blog about doing well - what is there to talk about? Nothing nearly as interesting as cries for help, essays on emotional eating, venting frustrations. I guess I could just post once a week with weekly weigh-in results. But that seems boring too. Ho-hum.

I'm not losing a whole lot or very quickly. I am a little disappointed but I am trying to think long-term. I do weigh every morning, which some people would call counter-productive. Better to focus on long-term trends than day-to-day fluctuations, right? Well... I don't know where I stand on that. If I start getting too hung up on it maybe I'll put the scale away. For now it's nice to keep tabs on things.

I am just desperate to get back out of the 200s... It was so easy to get back here, and such a struggle to get out! This morning was 203.2. That's down 0.6 from Tuesday's official count, so things are moving in the right direction. Keep it going, body, we got a long way to go.

This week I'm also being a little more vigilant about shaking up my food intake day to day. Instead of eating one level of points for seven days in a row I am utilizing those flex on some days. I agree with the general principle behind keeping your body guessing, and this recreates the calorie counting tactic of having a target range, instead of a precise caloric target. Of course with the points you are eating different levels day to day anyhow because of the impact of 0 point foods or foods with more fiber or whatever, but it doesn't make that big of a difference until you start factoring in flex. So we'll see how this goes for me.

I'm just rambling, I just felt the need to update. Maybe because my WL buddy who i typically talk to all day at work is out of the office today, so I miss her constant chatter... Well anyhow, I will most likely see you on the flip side of the weekend, good luck!

Weigh-In

I have to say I'm a little disappointed with this week's WI. I lost 1.6 lbs, which at most times would be commendable. I just feel like I put in more effort than that. I've been working out for 9 straight days. I've been OP food-wise for at least the last 7 days. And 1.6 in a week where everything as ostensibly been as on-plan as I can muster? It's just a little frustrating.

I know that 1.6 is still a great start. That this is a marathon, not a sprint. That it's better to lose anything than to gain, which is, in reality, what I would otherwise be doing right now. I know I am building muscle mass through exercise and that I could be getting leaner, just not lighter, at the moment. I am revving up my metabolism to carry me through my future weeks.

I know all of this. I know I am doing wonderful things for myself by continuing. I just still feel a little cheated. I need to tone down the importance I'm putting on the scale number and be happy about the other things I've noticed - my ability to do push-ups. The little shadows along the sides of my midsection which tell me there are muscles under there somewhere. The fact that my cravings for junk are far less overwhelming now than they were a week ago.

I may be a little disappointed, but in no way am I giving up. I'll take that 1.6 lbs and keep moving forward. I have no choice, really.

Day 7! Finito! A whole week!

I can't believe I've followed through on completing the 30 Day Shred every day for 7 days. That's nuts! Wonderful of course, but wow - I've never been this consistent in pursuing exercise. Wa hoo!

Things I've noticed:
-My overall endurance has changed crazy amounts since day 1, when I couldn't even finish a single exercise properly.
-I can do pushups! Modified (knee) pushups, yes, but pushups nonetheless. Day 5 I did ten. Day 6 I pushed to 13. Today, 15. Day 1? Um, well, gee. Maybe a half of one?
-Cardio endurance is much better. I can go the required 2 minutes without stopping. That doesn't seem like a lot, but that first bit of cardio circut is the hardest, and until a couple days ago I had to resort to waving my arms around without jumping during jumping jacks.
-I've lost over 3lbs so far. I don't have an exact starting weight. I have a weight from Day 2, which was 206, and today I was 203. Tuesday is official WI day and also Day 10 of this so that will be a neat weight to see.
-My belly appears to be moving south. I think that's because I am losing from the top down, around the ribcage. I appear smaller to my eye, at least around my ribcage. Neat.

I think tomorrow I will move to level 2. I guess in theory it's set up to do 10 days of each level, but two things are pushing me to move forward: 1) I am getting a little bored with the same routine and 2) I need to work some different muscles. I still feel vaguely sore after each day but nothing like that fun burn after the first few... Okay, third reason: While level 1 is by no means easy, it does not feel like the challenge it did when I first started.

I can't believe I just said that. Level 1 doesn't feel like a challenge! It's tough. It burns. It makes me sweat and pant. But I know I can do it. No harm in trying 2, if it's too much I'll come back down. That's reasonable.

One other thing I've noticed this week - I am hungry every few hours, but when I eat, I can barely eat anything before I feel full. I don't know why this is and actually hope it passes. Today I ate at 4pm. By 6:30, I was starving for dinner. Gave myself a big bowl of soup and ate half of it before I had to put it down. I had, like, 100 calories of food out of it. Grr. Time to go eat a spoonful of peanut butter or something similarly high-cal and low-bulk to make sure I get my calories in for the day.

Grunt work

I tend to make fun of people in the background of exercise DVDs and contestants on famous (unrealistic) weight-loss competition shows when they're back there doing squats, lifting weights, throwing kettlebells around and simultaneously sounding like they are birthing large watermelons.

RAAARRRHGHGHHH!!!

GUUUULALLLGGGHHHAAAA!

MMMUURRRRGGHAAGH!

I mean, come on (I say to myself as I sit idly on my couch, feet up, ice cream in hand). Who actually grunts and yells like that through a workout? I've been through a few tough workouts in my day (buffs fingernails on lapel) and I've never felt the need to vocalize in such an absurd manner. Don't these people have any dignity?

Well, consider me humbled.

I completed day 4 of the 30 Day Shred last night and, to put it bluntly, it made me grunt. Well, I made me grunt. It helped, it really did. The first circuit I always find to be the toughest (not sure if it's designed that way, or I just take a while to get into my groove). The strength portion of the first circuit consists of push ups, followed by squats combined with a dumbbell lift from your ears above your head as you come up. I admit, the past three days I quit doing the raises about halfway through and just do squats, because after two rounds of attempting to do push-ups my arms and shoulders are just ready to quit. This time I decided to try just a little bit harder. Push past that wall of discomfort and really try.

Next thing I know, I'm vocalizing my way through the lifts... and actually doing them.

So sorry for doubting you, background DVD and reality TV star people. My sincere apologies.

Updatey McUpdaterson

Well, I'm still trucking along. Progress in January was nil (well, net loss of -0.2lbs, my final January WI was 206.0). The good news is something seems to have come and bit me in the butt since then, as I've been trucking along rather nicely for the past few days. Of course, the first few days are easy days for me. The problems come after a week or two.

Spurred on by thoughts of having to publicly display myself in a bathing suit in approximately 6 weeks, I've started the 30 Day Shred and have completed 3 days of it so far (1/10th of the way there!). I actually really enjoy it. I get bored easily with videos - yoga, yawwwn. strength training, too slow, yawwwwn. just cardio? well dear lord I can't even keep up so I get discouraged after 5 minutes. The circuit aspect of 30DS seems to be what is keeping me interested. The strength portion consists of slow, repeated movements (and they BURN). when I've about had enough of that, though, it's time to drop the weights and pursue some cardio - simple, straightforward moves that even the most uncoordinated buffoon (me) can follow (jumping jacks, jump rope, butt kicks, boxing). After a few minutes when I'm tired of jumping, we get to move on to ab work. In the end, it's the variety that's kept me doing it so far. Also knowing that once I feel tired of level 1 I have two more levels to try keeps me a little goal-oriented, which helps. It's like a video game. Gotta beat level 1 so we can see what level 2 holds in store.

Exercise has had the added (obvious) benefit of making me want to stay on track with food. Why undo all that hard work I just did? To this end, working out in the evenings is really working in my favor, as evenings are the time of day I struggle the most, largely due to boredom. So I come home, eat dinner, wait for everything to settle, workout, and then my desire to eat mechanism is pretty much shut off for the day. The next big obstacle will be this weekend - I am potentially snowed in YET AGAIN, and trust me, it gets boring in my apartment all alone.

Now, off to find a snack. Then the mile walk home, followed by some snow shoveling and after that, yep, day 4.

Up!

So the last few days haven't quite been working out in my favor. I was doing pretty well with the weekend, which I thought was going to be my downfall. Turns out Sunday and Monday nights just suck for me. I can do really great for an entire week, but then the first few days of a week I have to clean out my fridge (and dump the contents into my belleh). Guh.

So I weighed in this morning and was up. My second week in and I'm already having gain weeks! Between how I started the week off (Tuesday last) and the past two days, I am not surprised. But what a way to start it off.

I'm contemplating moving my WI day. It used to be Saturday mornings. It's only Tuesday because my friend who is actually attending meetings in Toronto is going on Tuesdays, but there is no rule about us having to have the same WI day. I think it puts a bit too much pressure on me at the time of week I am weakest, typically. It feels kind of like setting myself up to fail, you know?

Well, here's the plan for the day. Off to a new start.

B: yogurt. granola. blueberries. touch of honey.
L: 3 sisters casserole. orange.
D: leftover chicken, chopped, on a salad. 1/2 a large potato. broccoli.

Not very exciting, huh.

Steps back, steps forward

I have this problem with WI days. I seem to feel like since I've had a good week, and I have a whole new week ahead of me until my next WI, I can just go ahead and eat whatever the hell I want for a day and undo the damage before my next WI. Okay, that may be true, I can undo a night's binge in a week, but all that does is get me to maintain. This week was no exception. I treated myself like a garbage can. Dumped a whole bunch of junk in there.

Something different happened this week, though. I made myself write every single thing down. Weights and measures, calories and points, it's all accounted for in my food journal. And yes, I went way beyond my points for the day, and way beyond my flex points for the week, but I wrote it all down. I think that's a step in the right direction. No more hiding, no pretending it didn't happen by denying it. I'm faced with the ugly truth of it til a new week starts.

Aside from that transgression, the week has been going well. I got my butt back into it the next day. This will be my first weekend back on plan with the boy in town, so I have to be extra careful - too easy to treat his visits like a special occasion and indulge mindlessly. I've planned out our dinners for the weekend and will have plenty of good stuff on hand for lunch, so I should be okay. I guess we'll see how it all turns out on Tuesday.